9 Dogs Howling

Step by step

2012-01-29T09:57:00.004-06:00

We no longer have a couch, so I shoved the coffee table against the wall. Some of the dogs like to lie underneath it (like a little clubhouse) but yesterday Georgie decided to explore the top of it. Since he's way too short and chubby to jump directly onto it, he first hopped up in the littlest dog chair (on the right in this pic), then onto the coffee table, then on the throw pillow that happened to be on it. By the time I got the camera out, he'd already moved on, intent on checking out the sewing machine cabinet.

It's cold outside!

2012-01-29T09:10:00.001-06:00

But we're nice and warm and cuddled up inside.

He's doing it again!

2012-01-24T20:31:00.004-06:00

It just isn't fair. Babe does it over and over again, being adorable, being irresistable, smiling, tucking those big Bassett paws in against his little body, exuding cuteness and softness and pet-ability until I can't bear it another minute and have to bury my face in his neck and kiss him and whisper to him in baby talk.

Queen Patch Reigns Supreme

2012-01-24T20:24:00.004-06:00

When Patch first arrived, she was a ditch dog and although we liked her, we didn't give her our hearts immediately, thinking she would wander off as so many dogs do out here in the country. But she stayed, and she played her cards right. Always polite, never demanding, sweetly appreciative for every little friendly gesture and every cup of kibble we gave. Little did we know that she was secretly a slut who'd been sleeping around the neighborhood and was knocked up with pups from two (count 'em, two) daddies. We're now convinced that she got pregnant on purpose, to play on our heartstrings and earn her way inside the house. She slept in a crate in the garage without complaint, but when she went into labor on the coldest December day we'd seen down here, we brought her inside. She had her pups, and she stayed. And although she is still grateful, she also knows she's got it made, and she's proud of her status as the #3 Indoor Dog (Georgie being #1 and Polly #2). All hail Queen Patch!

Another busy day

2012-01-24T20:20:00.003-06:00

In front: Teddy is giving serious consideration to turning over on his other side. We can't be hasty in making important decisions like that, you know.
At the rear: Babe is saying, "I'm the cutest pup. You know I'm the cutest. Admit it."

Interspecies Friendship

2012-01-19T06:39:00.001-06:00

Hi, my name is Blondie. What's your name?
(gurgle) My name is Goldie. Wanna swim?

Still Life with Cat

2012-01-19T06:33:00.001-06:00

Lisa's kitty Pashmina is usually too shy to pose for a picture, but here she shows that she

knows she's gorgeous.

The orchard

2012-01-18T16:00:00.002-06:00

We're not sure if our orchard is for us, or the deer!

Our neighbor's cows

2012-01-18T15:45:00.001-06:00

Monday night at the movies

2012-01-13T16:01:00.003-06:00

Georgie's waiting for a re-run of ET to start while Meg & Babe look out the front window, saying, "Hey, is that Steven Speildog coming down the driveway?"

Friday morning staff meeting

2012-01-13T15:58:00.004-06:00

Here are the Dunderheads waiting for the Friday morning staff meeting. CMO (Chief Medical Officer) Polly will give a lecture and demonstration of proper ear hygiene, but Meg's more interested in her twat than her ears.

But it's cosy

2011-11-21T20:05:00.001-06:00

Meg insists that this isn't too tight of a fit. She says it's cosy.

In the drawing room with Teddy & Noel

2011-11-06T12:07:00.003-06:00

Teddy tells the tale....

"So Noel told Dorothy that people are wrong when they say opera is not what it used to be. It is what it used to be. That is what's wrong with it."

So I said, "What a pair of yobs you are" and glared at them.

And Dorothy said, "Don't look at me in that tone of voice."

Rest in peace, sweet Lucy

2011-11-06T12:00:00.004-06:00

Lucy was hit by a car a few days ago. She ran off and we didn't see her for a day or so. On Thursday morning I found her lying on the cement walk in the pouring rain. No visible injuries, eyes open, no complaint when I hugged her and (eventually) moved her onto some cushions inside the garage. I think she was probably in shock. She didn't seem to be suffering, and I felt that an emergency vet visit would be traumatic for both of us and represented an expense that probably wouldn't save her. I checked on her once an hour before I left for work that afternoon. One time she kind of smiled when I petted her, but the other times she was fading.

When I got home from work that night, Mr. P. said (with tears in his eyes) that he had put her out of her misery. Poor Mr. P. Poor Lucy. She was a dear, sweet, goofy girl, and we're going to miss her.

A bit of roughhousing?

2011-11-04T09:19:00.001-05:00

Teddy: Honest, Grammy, we've been sound asleep all afternoon. We didn't touch your pictures.

Jinx: What pictures?

Our very own panda bear

2011-11-04T09:08:00.002-05:00

Mr. P. found one of those cutesy animal hats discarded on campus and brought it home for Meg

(it's far too big for Polly, and doesn't contrast very well with Patch's coloring). Meg was hurt when Berry stole the hat, but I got even with him by tying it onto his block head. In this photo, he's thinking, "Aw, man, I hope my friends don't see me wearing this stupid hat."

The Big Grin

2011-10-26T13:15:00.004-05:00

Mr. P. claims that Berry makes scary faces at him, revealing his teeth in a sort of growl, and calls him "Scary Berry." When I see Berry's toothy grain, I see something quite different, something that's actually quite adorable...

Meg's boo-boo ear

2011-10-26T13:08:00.002-05:00

Recently Meg developed a big hematoma on one ear, probably the result of too much licking or rubbing. Ear-licking is one of the most popular leisure-time activities here at 9 Dogs Howling.

Georgie had a hematoma on his ear a few years ago that required surgery and a temporary drain. Apparently the procedure has changed, because Meg had surgery to drain the blood and about 1" x 1/2" of the interior of her ear was left exposed, with big stitches threaded through clear plastic tubes to hold her ear together. It's very strange looking but she doesn't seem to mind it, especially because Grammy has to give her medicine twice a day - a doggy ibuprofen (very tasty, according to Meg) and an antibiotic pill buried in a lump of peanut butter. Meg had never experienced peanut butter before and is now addicted to it. When I go to the cupboard where the peanut butter is kept, every dog comes running, and they're very disappointed if I pull out a bag of kidney beans instead. They'd probably like the kidney beans OK, but we're not going down that road right now.

One size fits most

2011-10-26T13:04:00.000-05:00

Big & Little

2011-10-08T07:52:00.002-05:00

Please try to ignore how dirty this chair is while you enjoy this illustration of the lion lying down with the lamb.

Speaking of Chairs....

2011-10-08T07:50:00.000-05:00

This little Goldilocks found just the right size chair.

Front Porch View

2011-10-08T07:45:00.003-05:00

One of the most popular spots here at the 9 Dogs Howling Ranch is a chair on the front porch. I bought that chair in China about 10 years ago and had it, another chair, and a matching table shipped home in a container of goods going to my employer's warehouse. Mr. P. and I used to sit on those chairs while shelling beans and enjoying fresh air and sunshine. Then our pet population exploded, and now we're seldom allowed to use the chairs. If Lucy isn't perched in a chair trying to chew the bark off, the cats are in charge of it.

Can we come in now, pretty please?

2011-10-02T08:32:00.004-05:00

It's cold outside. It's snowing and sleeting and we forgot to put on our mittens and hats. Please can we come inside now?

Goldilocks and the Three Chairs

2011-10-02T08:10:00.005-05:00

When I got home from work a few days ago, I discovered a semi-circle of chairs in the living room. Mr. P. had brought home a tiny child's armchair (discarded on the college campus where he works) to add to the furniture grouping in the television viewing area. So now Goldilocks has three chairs to choose from: extra small, small, and medium.

Since I don't watch television, I'm not allowed inside the enchanted circle. My chair is the big blue one in the background, which Berry is keeping warm for me.

Law of Nature #893

2011-09-26T07:16:00.001-05:00

Law of Nature #893: where there is a box, there is a cat

Kilroy was Here

2011-09-25T11:26:00.000-05:00

2011-09-08T14:55:00.002-05:00

While relaxing on the picnic table, Teddy shares thoughts about the end of summer.

"So yeah, George Hamilton and I really enjoyed sunbathing together this summer but he had to get back to L.A. I was sorry to see him go but he left me some really good weed and I gotta tell ya, I am baked. So, ya got any brownies or cookies or anything I could munch on?"

If Georgie can do it, so can I

2011-09-08T14:30:00.002-05:00

Inspired by Georgie, Berry attempted to climb the stepstool to the table near my desk. After sniffing the table, he decided it wasn't worth the climb, but getting down again proved to be more difficult than he had anticipated. Luckily I was able to rescue him before anything truly humiliating happened.

I got you covered, bro

2011-08-31T19:05:00.001-05:00

Rub-A-Dub-Dub

2011-08-31T17:26:00.003-05:00

Three dogs in a tub! Kind of...

Responsible pet owners

2011-08-29T17:07:00.002-05:00

Mr. P. & I often joke that our local animal hospital will soon be able to build a new 9 Dogs Howling wing on the money they've made caring for our critters.

I've been in their waiting room when people came rushing in with a dog they found abandoned and/or injured at the side of the road, or some other canine find, so I know they deal with discarded animals all the time. Surely they know how much it costs to provide veterinary care for all those animals?

I recently found myself in a conversation with one of the vets at that facility, who seemed to think we hadn't been providing adequate care for our gang. Well, no. We give heartworm medicine and yearly exams/shots to the indoor dogs, and the rest (canine or feline) get only flea/tick meds, food and water. Unless they come up with some obvious disease or injury (sad to say, we've lost 2 cats to bad injuries), they're on their own. So when the vet says, "Why hasn't Lucy had [xyz]?", I can only say, "We have NINE dogs and 3 cats and just barely have enough money to feed them all!" And I want to ask, "Can we get some kind of government subsidy for running an animal shelter at our house?"

You have HOW many dogs?

2011-08-29T17:05:00.002-05:00

I don't go everywhere bragging about it, but occasionally it comes up in conversation.

I say, "We have 9 dogs."

And they say, "You have HOW many dogs?"

I repeat, "Nine."

And they say something like, "Why?"

And I say, "One day this stray dog came along and..."

We were so poor...

2011-08-26T11:09:00.004-05:00

My mom and her friend Quimby used to try to outdo each other with stories of childhood poverty. "We were so poor, we slept on beds without mattresses." "We were poor, we slept on the floor." "We were so poor, we used newspaper for toilet paper." "We were so poor, we used leaves for toilet paper." And so on.

Well, Lucy has a similar story. In a recent conversation, Blackie said, "I was so poor, my only toy was a secondhand nylabone." And Lucy said, "I was so poor, my only toy was a summer squash."

Heeeere's Lucy!

2011-08-26T10:39:00.003-05:00

I was finally able to get Lucy to sit still long enough for me to photograph her. She still looks kind of skanky but her skin infection is much better and her fur is growing again.

Above and Beyond

2011-08-15T17:15:00.002-05:00

Berry knows that we perceive him as a fat, lazy dog who could easily be converted into a coffee table, but he's able to think above and beyond that. He's a finer, truer, more spiritually developed dog, one who has spent many hours of meditation (that we thought were naps) achieving intellectual and spiritual heights that we may never know.

A Safe Haven

2011-08-15T17:10:00.002-05:00

Last week, the new "shortie" chair in the living room got tipped over (it's a long story). But Georgie, who loves that chair, was somehow able to find a comfy spot in it.

A man without a beard

2011-08-06T06:40:00.001-05:00

Fritz's beard was so nasty, the groomer had to shave it off. Lisa says he looks like a lemur now, and I can tell by the look on his face that he knows he looks like a dork without his beard.

Dog happy

2011-07-28T06:13:00.002-05:00

According to my dog-a-day calendar, a study conducted by the American Kennel Club (clearly an unbiased organization) found that dog owners are more likely than non-dog owners to describe themselves as "happy". Well, duh. We needed a study to discover this plainly evident fact?

Georgie's new perch

2011-07-27T19:31:00.004-05:00

A few days ago, Georgie noticed the step stool near my desk for the first time and decided he had to climb it. Because it was there, you know. Then he sat down and thought about it for a while. It gave him a good view of Mommy, but Mommy was doing boring computer stuff, so he flopped down for a little snooze while Polly tiptoed away...

Bring me another Margarita!

2011-07-27T19:27:00.001-05:00

I'm sittin' on the dock of the bay
Watching the tide roll away
Ooo, I'm just sittin' on the dock of the bay
Wastin' time

The new chair

2011-07-27T19:21:00.002-05:00

Mr. P. often finds discarded furniture, electronics, packaged food, you name it, in the dumpsters at work. Departing students dump it all without much thought for its value. Occasionally, those items find their way into the back of Mr. P's truck and come home to serve us quite well for several years.

This week, the find was a shortened armchair, perhaps missing its base and/or legs. It turns out to be the perfect chair for our geriatric pup, Georgie, who can no longer jump up on Mr. P's blue platform rocker. We put it right next to Mr. P's chair so they can watch car races and other guy stuff together.

In this photo, you can see that Teddy is very intrigued by the new chair and thinking seriously about joining Georgie in it. It's just a matter of time...

Movin' In

2011-07-27T19:10:00.004-05:00

The new crate in the living room is supposed to be for Polly & Georgie, but Patch has been asserting her rights as Senior Outdoor Dog (and reminding us that she has earned her Indoor Dog Good Conduct Badge) by moving on in.

The 3 Schnitzels

2011-07-25T18:04:00.004-05:00

Ziggy (blue collar), Fritz (red collar) & Lionel (weiner) relaxing on the deck on a fine summer day.

The Sentry

2011-07-25T09:03:00.005-05:00

WARNING: Schnauzer on Duty!

Teddy's Head Rest

2011-07-05T10:23:00.004-05:00

I am not at all fond of the bed here in my study - it came from Mr. P's family and while it's sturdy, it's also ugly. But if we didn't have a bed in my study, where would the dogs sleep? It would be so terribly cruel to make them lie on the floor...so the bed remains, and the undulating shape of the footboard turns out to be the perfect head rest (or should I say chin rest) for Teddy.

Porch Sitting

2011-07-05T06:35:00.005-05:00

About 10 years ago, I bought some rustic outdoor furniture (2 chairs & a table) in China,had it shipped home, and put it out on our front porch. Smoky has taken over one of the chairs, and newly-arrived Lucy has taken over the other one.

Making the most of the warm spots

2011-06-13T17:19:00.004-05:00

The new porcelain tile floor is, as we were warned, very cool. Actually, it's cold, and unless the dogs have been out in the 90F heat for a while and want to cool off, they are always in search of a warm spot.

Berry never disappoints

2011-06-13T17:12:00.002-05:00

Berry never disappoints us, mainly because he's so lazy, we expect nothing of him.

Nothing but the plumpness and juiciness and deliciousness of a fresh-picked blackberry.

Happy to Be Here

2011-06-13T16:43:00.002-05:00

This is a come-n-get-me pose we usually find Jinx in, but he's obviously taught it to his adopted son, Babe.

Babe is extremely proud of himself because he's finally big enough to jump up on the bed by himself. He's still very short and very long, but nothing's gonna stop him from going where he wants to go!

Jinx's not-so-secret smile

2011-06-13T16:28:00.002-05:00

Jinx is a very earnest young man who takes his job as protector of his house, yard and family very, very seriously. He often looks almost sad, weighed down by all his responsibility. But sometimes, when he's relaxed on the pillows on the bed in my study, Jinx's secret smile can be seen.

The Downward Dog

2011-06-13T16:18:00.003-05:00

I've been doing some yoga exercises as part of my Pilates classes for the last few months and learned how to do the yoga position called the Downward Dog. Although I'm quite familiar with many typical dog poses, I didn't understand the name of the Downward Dog until I saw Teddy doing some stretching exercises on the deck yesterday. Then I understood completely.

Skinny Dipping with Patch

2011-06-13T16:13:00.003-05:00

Patch has put on some weight and is quite, um...matronly now, but she is not in the least concerned about fitting into last year's bikini. As soon as Grampa sets up the kiddie pool, Patch is going skinny dipping. Will you join her in jumping off the high-dive?

Bikini Season Approaches

2011-06-13T16:07:00.003-05:00

Bikini season is fast approaching, and the owner of the fitness studio I frequent has launched her Summer Shape Up program with rigorous toning and shaping routines designed to make us all stunning at the pool or on the beach. Unfortunately, the studio is only for humans, and I fear that without some serious exercise, Miss Meg won't fit into her pink polka dot bikini this year.

Sleepyhead

2011-06-08T10:54:00.004-05:00

As always, Polly has a very busy schedule here. She supervises all human, canine and feline activity. She's responsible for the Mealtime Warning System, an important function even though no one has ever forgotten to feed her in all the years she's lived here. She also has to lick both ears belonging to the other dogs at least once a day, preferably three times a day. And she also has to administer her patented Pug Hugs to her mom and dad. Polly's a spry little lady, but even she gets so tired she can barely keep her eyes open.

New House Rules at 9 Dogs Howling

2011-06-08T10:47:00.005-05:00

We just finished a big home improvement project here at 9 Dogs Howling Headquarters. We had the nasty carpeting in the living room, hallways, laundry room, and my study replaced with beautiful porcelain tiles. The dogs were not allowed inside during the project, which was hard on everyone. Earlier this week they came inside for the first time since we began the project weeks ago and were extremely puzzled to find cold tiles instead of their beloved, warm, stinky carpet. Since the weather here is in the mid 90's, you'd think they'd appreciate nice cool tiles, but no.

Anyway, one of the new House Rules here is that the indoor dogs must be crated at night and when all the humans are gone during the day. Polly & Georgie don't mind this at all, partly because their crate is one of the only soft, warm places here for a dog to sit now. We've gotten a bigger, wire crate since this photo of Georgie was taken. As you can see, he's resting comfortably.

Leaping Lizards!

2011-05-26T18:58:00.001-05:00

Or napping lizards, as the case may be...

The World Is My Toilet

2011-05-26T18:35:00.004-05:00

Smoky says: It's great to be an outdoor cat. I have a litter box in the garage, and the entire world outside the garage is my toilet.

Looking Good

2011-05-26T18:02:00.003-05:00

The new porcelain tile flooring is looking good. We can only hope that it will be as impervious to pet damage as we've been told. Anything would be better than carpeting at this point.

Work in Progress

2011-05-26T17:46:00.002-05:00

Polly stopped by to do a quick inspection of the flooring work in progress.

The truth will out

2011-05-26T17:19:00.004-05:00

We knew that the dogs were piddling inside, drawn by the irresistible scent of the previous owner's dog's urine and compelled by the Canine Mandate of Marking Your Territory, but we didn't know how bad it was until the carpet came off the floor last week and revealed the disgusting truth. They were peeing in places that we didn't even know about. As John the Carpet Man explained, "That's the problem with carpet. It hides everything."

Rites of Passage

2011-05-26T17:11:00.004-05:00

Last week, Licorice and Spice graduated from Kitten School and (as all 9 Dogs Howling residents must be) were neutered in the interests of population control. They came through this rite of passage feeling that Going To Camp (i.e., the animal hospital) sucks, but they were back on the job the next day.

Eenie, meanie, minie, moe...

2011-04-25T13:09:00.002-05:00

Catch a puppy by the toe...

Fowl News

2011-04-15T17:07:00.002-05:00

Mr. P. has already suffered a ridiculous number of tick bites this year despite wearing long pants or coveralls when working in the garden or the yard. Insects must find his flesh especially sweet, and his flesh finds the bites especially irritating, resulting in huge, red, swollen, extremely itchy wounds. He thought about blasting the daylights out of our property using the most powerful insecticide he could find (and since he's state certified for the application of that kind of stuff, I'm sure he could get the really strong stuff), but a coworker suggested a more environmentally-friendly approach.... BANTAM ROOSTERS (a.k.a "Banties"). We'll start with a few males (much like the human species, they're less expensive than hens) and a small pen, and let them eat insects to their hearts' delight, with occasional vacations in the fenced-in garden for special treats like grubs. This pen will be adjacent to the dogs' outdoor condo. Do you see any potential for problems in that? I do. I foresee an early morning cock-a-doodle-do that incites the Dunderheads to a howling choir practice. The other risk is that the Banties could become victims of hawks and other birds of prey, of which we have plenty here. Which could be hard to bear since within 24 hours of their arrival, every rooster will have a name, a personality, a list of likes and dislikes, and his own cell-phone and Facebook page.

I got your back, buddy

2011-04-15T09:13:00.003-05:00

Canine Geometry

2011-03-29T18:57:00.002-05:00

I'm happy to announce that the 2,489th edition of Webster's Dictionary will include this illustration for the word PERPENDICULAR.

Canine Pie Chart

2011-03-29T18:48:00.002-05:00

Here we have your canine pie chart. Like every other statistician on earth, I quickly draw your attention to the things in it that agree with my personal assessment of the situation and ask that you ignore any data that refutes my assessment. Understood? OK, let us begin our analysis. It is clear from this chart that 51% of the floor space is occupied by black dogs while only 49% is occupied by brown dogs. From this we must conclude that black dogs are superior and therefore must be fed 2% more kibble than brown dogs. The findings of this important study will be published by Dr. McMillan in the April 2011 issue of the International Journal of Inconsequential Data, with a byline in tiny print giving Dr. P. credit for shampooing the carpet before the experiment was conducted. Teddy's saying, "Was that my cell phone I heard ringing?" His ringtone is the theme song from "Lassie Come Home."

What I learned at my father's knee

2011-03-29T18:45:00.001-05:00

Babe reports that he is learning a lot at his father's knee, with special emphasis on heinies and peepees.

Father & Son

2011-03-21T07:17:00.003-05:00

We feared that Jinx (alpha dog) would hate Babe, but instead, he's adopted him as a son. The family resemblance is quite clear (although Babe is much longer than he is tall, while Jinx is very tall). Jinx is busy teaching Babe how to be a man. The rest of the dogs are busy teaching Babe how to be a dunderhead. Babe exhibits aptitude for both roles.

Mix-n-Match!

2011-03-12T11:39:00.005-06:00

We got your short dogs, we got your medium dogs, we got your long dogs. Black dogs, blonde dogs, brown dogs, white dogs, everything dogs. Adopt one, get one free. Mix-n-Match! Cheaper by the dozen! Get 'em now, before we run out!

And the nap goes on...

2011-02-18T09:33:00.001-06:00

Babe's Application

2011-02-18T09:23:00.004-06:00

New arrivals at 9 Dogs Howling are required to submit an application, a $5000 security deposit, and an essay (maximum 500 words) about why they should live here. Here's the discussion Babe and I had about his essay:

Babe: I should live at 9 Dogs Howling because I'm the cutest puppy there ever was.

Jean: Yeah, they all say that.

Babe: No, it's true. I'm the cutest ever.

Jean: First Georgie said that, then Polly, then Patch, and after that, it was downhill all the way.

Babe: I'll be good, I promise.

Jean: Oh? What about the lamp cord over there?

Babe: I'm a puppy! How was I supposed to know I'm not supposed to chew electrical cords?

Jean: And what about the corner of the hassock?

Babe: But Teddy and Jinx had already chewed on it when I got there. I was just evening it up, you know?

Jean: Yeah, I've heard that one before, too.

Babe moves in

2011-02-05T08:49:00.004-06:00

The new puppy, Babe, has already worked himself into the Outdoor Dog pack here at 9 Dogs Howling and feels very much at home now. The cats are not pleased about it. Babe figures that any moving object is worth investigating for its entertainment value.

Blackberry Cheesecake

2011-02-05T08:35:00.004-06:00

You thought Jinx cheesecake was good. But that was before you had a bite of irresistible Blackberry cheesecake...rich and deeee-licious!

As an aside: in this photo you see that the tip of Berry's penis is white. All three of Patch's male puppies have this same white spot. I suppose it makes the penis easier to find in the dark?

The new arrival

2011-02-03T11:00:00.003-06:00

A few mornings ago, I found a note from Mr. P. on the kitchen table. It read: THERE'S A PUPPY IN THE GARAGE.

I hadn't had any coffee yet, so I just thought, "Yeah, so what else is new?" Then 10-15 minutes later I was awake enough for my curiosity to send me out to the garage (in the freezing cold) to see what was waiting for me there.

And there was indeed a puppy, maybe 2-3 months old, looking a lot like Jinx and Berry but with very short legs. He's absolutely adorable (aren't they all?) and Trudy has adopted him as her new best pal.

Puppies, puppies, everywhere

2011-01-28T19:27:00.002-06:00

In this photo, you can see the #1 kitchen assistant, Berry, close to the counter, where he is more likely to capture falling roasts of beef and other fantasies. And George is, as always, right in front the fridge, where he will get pissed off every time a human opens the fridge door, but where his butt feels good because of the warm air coming out of the bottom vent. Meg is in the middle of the floor and on full alert duty, so Teddy (in the foreground) apparently feels safe enough to have a nap despite all the kitchen action because surely Meg would bark and wake him up if a cat were somehow to find its way into the house.

What do you mean, get out of the way?

2011-01-16T14:18:00.002-06:00

This room is 15' x 20' and you're saying you can't get across the room because we're in the way? What a cry baby!

The Canine Sea of Love

2011-01-16T12:27:00.001-06:00

More cheesecake

2011-01-09T09:47:00.003-06:00

I'll have another piece of that yummy cheesecake, please. Make this a BIG one!

Sunday Morning Red Alert

2011-01-09T09:35:00.005-06:00

Here's how the 9 Dogs Howling Red Alert System works.

Jinx sees a dead leaf flutter in the pasture across the street and begins to growl.

Patch runs to the window to assist, whining softly.

Meg gallops over to look, can't see anything, but Jinx's growling trips her howling switch.

Goober assumes that a party has started and decides to crash it.

Berry hears Goober talking about a party and runs over to see if anyone's serving Buffalo Wings.

Teddy thinks Meg is singing, "O come, all ye faithful" and joins in the hymn singing.

Under the mistaken impression that the attacker is approaching from the north, not the south, Georgie runs to the French doors.

All the other dogs race back to the French doors and clamor to be let outside.

Meanwhile, Polly wags her tail and says, "Can I have a biscuit while they're outside?"

Winter Camping

2011-01-09T09:30:00.003-06:00

When I was in college and madly in love with my 1st husband, we would go winter camping in the White Mountains of New Hampshire. Now, I'm not talking camper camping. I'm talking tent & sleeping bag camping. On snow covering frozen ground. Why? I already explained that with 3 words: madly in love. Because human memory tends to block out memories of pain (like childbirth), I had forgotten all about winter camping until I looked out into the front yard this morning and saw that Trudy had set up camp by dragging some of her bedding from the garage to the front lawn and settling down to rest a while.

One patch of sun

2011-01-09T09:22:00.002-06:00

One patch of sun + 2 small dogs = adorable to the zillionth degree

The incompatibility of dogs and cleanliness

2011-01-09T09:12:00.002-06:00

8:35 am - clean floor
8:36 am - dogs come inside
8:37 am - dirty floor
9:00 am - clean floor
9:01 am - dogs go outside
9:22 am - dogs come inside again
9:23 am - dirty floor
repeat all day, every day, and you begin to understand that dogs and cleanliness are just not compatible

Daddy's Girl

2011-01-07T16:34:00.004-06:00

Dear God,
It's me, Patch. I just want to thank you again for sending me to live at 9 Dogs Howling. I love it here. It's so comfy and I get fed every day with treats, too, and I'm never lonely or bored, and I have the best daddy in the whole world. When his hands are cold, he pets me with his gloves on so I won't get cold. And he loves me better than all the other dogs put together. I don't care what they say: I am the only Daddy's girl.

Gifts from Santy Paws

2010-12-25T18:09:00.002-06:00

When we had only two small dogs, Santy Paws delivered toys and treats every Christmas. Since then, Santa has spent too much money on vet bills and food to afford Christmas gifts. But today, Grampy Santa delivered a basketful of slightly used tennis balls. They were a great success. Each dog spent hours (well, maybe minutes) chewing the coating off each ball. The balls ended up looking like sickly but beloved navel oranges, as you see here...

The Great TP Mystery

2010-12-25T16:51:00.003-06:00

When the puppies were younger, we had to keep the bathroom door closed because the toilet paper was too much of a temptation for them. They would grab one end of the roll and festoon the living room with TP. Eventually, that game lost its appeal and we started leaving the bathroom door open again.

In the past week or so, we've noticed that some critter has been chewing on one end of the TP roll..but who? Was it one dog, or were they taking turns?

Today I caught the criminal in the act. You won't be surprised to learn that it's Goober, and that he experiences not one ounce of shame or regret about this bad new habit. His response to my reprimand: "So what?"

So what?

2010-12-21T18:54:00.002-06:00

Goober says, "So what? So I'm bigger and fatter and shinier than all the rest. What did I do to deserve all this? Not much. I just had to creep down the driveway, quivering and crying, get Grammy to pick me up and hug me, and the rest is history. Yeah, so I'm part pit-bull. You got a problem with that? Huh? Huh?"

The 9 Dogs Howling Version of the Vulcan Mind Meld

2010-12-21T18:45:00.002-06:00

Teddy: I'm thinking Florida Keys.
Berry: I'm thinking Mediterranean Food Tour.
Teddy: But I'm too relaxed to get up and make the reservations.
Berry: And who's going to pay for it?
Teddy: Grammy & Grampa?
Berry: Get real! They keep asking me when I'm going to get a paper route and earn my kibble.
Teddy: They're so mean!

Let sleeping dogs lie

2010-12-16T10:21:00.003-06:00

Even Goober looks sweet and angelic when he's asleep.

When they're awake, Jinx and Goober argue constantly about who's Top Dog, but come nap time, it's kind of nice to snuggle up with your brother.

Goober's First Snow Day

2010-12-16T10:16:00.003-06:00

Every kid loves a snow day...no school, building snowmen, throwing snowballs, catching snowflakes on your tongue, making snow angels. This photo shows Goober enjoying snow for the first time in his life. The other dogs, who are more blase about snow, stayed inside where it was warm and dry, but Goober stayed outside, sometimes playing, sometimes just enjoying the magic of a snow day.

Possum and the kittens

2010-12-07T07:17:00.004-06:00

Possum's kittens turned out to be boys. Possum's going to the vet to be spayed this Friday, and the kittens will go with her to be boarded that night, because we don't trust Trudy with them if Possum's not there to protect them. They're feisty little guys, but they're still far too small to stand up to a big dog.

Holiday greetings

2010-12-07T07:13:00.004-06:00

A friend of Mr. P's who lives in Connecticut sent him a Christmas card and wrote on it:

"My best to the wife and 4000 dogs."

You'd think he'd actually been here to visit, saying that. It might feel like we have 4000 dogs, Roger, but it's really only 10.

Only 10?

Where's Waldo?

2010-12-03T19:47:00.002-06:00

You might look at this picture, taken at 7:00 this morning, and think there's enough dogs in the living room. But there's only 6 dogs: Polly, Georgie, Berry, Teddy, Jinx and Patch. Meg and Goober were AWOL, Blackie and Trudie were outside, and goodness knows where Waldo is.

A Man & His Weiner

2010-11-30T06:57:00.002-06:00

I can't decide who's cuter in this photo, John or his little weiner, Lionel.

In the final analysis, Lionel wins because of those chubby, kissable paws. I'm not saying that John's paws aren't kissable, but I don't kiss any appendages of other women's husbands.

If dogs love to chew...

2010-11-30T06:19:00.002-06:00

I've lived with dogs for 56 years, and I think I know the canine species pretty well by now. I think I can say without fear of successful contradiction that dogs love to chew. They love to chew bones, furniture, shoes, toes, you name it. But not food. They wait all day for a cup of crunchy dog kibble, greet it with joyous enthusiasm, and inhale it all without chewing it once. Then they look up at me with eager, inquiring faces, saying, "Where did all my food go? Can I have more?"

Why? Why do they do that? These aren't wild dogs who don't know where their next meal of dead squirrel is coming from. These are spoiled domesticated dogs who have never known true hunger or need in their entire rotten lives. But they would rather chew the carpet than chew their delicious dog kibble.

I just don't understand it.

Possession is all...

2010-11-21T16:05:00.002-06:00

In Jinx's world, POSSESSION means everything. He must possess the bone, or the chair, or the pillow, even if it causes him discomfort. And of course, once he possess whatever it is, he can't relax. Possession requires constant vigilance.

Sad News

2010-11-17T18:09:00.002-06:00

Sadly, I must report that 4 of Possum's kittens disappeared and only 2 remain. We suspect that Trudy took them out into the back yard or pasture to play with them and left the poor little things to fend for themselves there, and there they perished.

Possum is extra vigilant about protecting the 2 remaining kittens. Even when Mr. P. or I gently pet or hold them, Possum is close by, watching and waiting. When Trudy gets near one of those kittens, Possum bops the crap out of her. Hell hath no fury like an angry feline mom.

One kitten is black and named Licorice. The other is a grey tiger like Possum and named Spice. Like their mom, they have very long, skinny tails. Unlike their mom, their tails bend at a 90 degree angle at the end.

As soon as I can manage it, I'll post photos of them. But man, do those little guys/girls move fast!

Our new neighbor, the Incredible Mr. Ed

2010-11-02T17:31:00.004-05:00

About a month ago, one of our neighbors, a retired farmer, put a horse in the pasture that adjoins ours. I know virtually nothing about horses, but as far as I can tell, this is a brown gelding of unknown heritage. I don't know if horses are social animals, but it seems to me that this guy is lonely. He has a big pasture with trees and plantlife and hills and valleys...but no other critters

(except when our kitties and outdoor dogs venture out there).

Of course, Mr. Parker immediately started a horse friendship campaign, offering Mr. Ed a variety of treats like corn stalks, turnip greens, tomatoes, bell peppers, and other items from our garden. Mr. Ed was not impressed. A week ago, Mr. P.. declared loudly that he was NOT going to give Mr. Ed any apples, but yesterday he gave Mr. Ed a few apples with such great results that we are now feeding Mr. Ed apples several times a day.

After munching his requisite apples, Mr. Ed is willing to let us pet and admire him. He seems like a fine man to me, but Mr. P. says his hooves are split and there are other signs of neglect. Why would a horse owner put Mr. Ed out to pasture like this? Mr. Ed sure seems like a great guy to us. Of course, we can afford to feed another critter about as well as we can afford to re-build the Brooklyn Bridge. But it's pretty nice to pet Mr. Ed's fuzzy muzzle as long as you don't look too closely at the discolored teethb covered with foamy saliva and partially-chewed grass.

Arwen's Halloween

2010-11-02T14:34:00.001-05:00

Can you find the kitty in this picture?

Design advice from Reiki

2010-10-23T08:16:00.004-05:00

My friend Nina learned to sew recently and has already made dozens of nice things as gifts and for her home. This week she decided to stitch her grandmother's table runners together and then make them into a quilt. Of course, Reiki is close by, offering design advice.

Berry's in the dog house

2010-10-17T18:27:00.002-05:00

For the past few weeks, every time I open the door to the master bedroom (where dogs are not allowed), Berry (who feels that he is the #1 candidate for Indoor Dog) has raced in like a rocket and landed triumphantly on the bed, smiling and wagging his tail after first checking my nightstand for used Kleenex (a yummy treat). I regret to say that I have rewarded him for this behavior by laughing and kissing him.

But no more.

Tonight he did the bed-rocket routine and while I was reaching out to pet him, he squatted and peed on the bed. Marking his territory, no doubt. I instantly switched into Psycho Grammy mode and cast him out of the room. He slunk out into the living room, where Psycho Grampy accosted and scolded him.

When the bedding was in the washing machine and everything had calmed down, I went back into my study, sat down, and attempted to work again. Within a few minutes, Jinx, Meg, and Teddy and Patch came up to me in turns to remind me that they are good dogs who never pee on the bed. They all said, "Vote for me as the Indoor Dog!"