When Patch first arrived, she was a ditch dog and although we liked her, we didn't give her our hearts immediately, thinking she would wander off as so many dogs do out here in the country. But she stayed, and she played her cards right. Always polite, never demanding, sweetly appreciative for every little friendly gesture and every cup of kibble we gave. Little did we know that she was secretly a slut who'd been sleeping around the neighborhood and was knocked up with pups from two (count 'em, two) daddies. We're now convinced that she got pregnant on purpose, to play on our heartstrings and earn her way inside the house. She slept in a crate in the garage without complaint, but when she went into labor on the coldest December day we'd seen down here, we brought her inside. She had her pups, and she stayed. And although she is still grateful, she also knows she's got it made, and she's proud of her status as the #3 Indoor Dog (Georgie being #1 and Polly #2). All hail Queen Patch!